Hello everyone, it is once again time for Miao Miao's Show.
Today I'm going to first talk about the horoscopes of today.
Today pisces need to be careful of working too hard at work.
Cirrhosis is a very serious problem. I hope...
Ahh.. This Jiang Miao Miao is a liar.
When I was in college, we were in the same college.
I reported her and she got expelled.
Qian Dodo, I said you wouldn't get married.
Did you get married yet?
Qian Dodo, I said you wouldn't get married.
Qian Dodo,
I said that you would never get married in your life time.
Did you get married?
Why is the television talking to me?
Huh? I said you wouldn't get married. Did you get married yet?
Did you have a nightmare?
Then did you
dream of me?
Subtitles brought to you by The Dodo Team @ Viki
Never Give Up, Dodo Episode 7
I didn't think that that punch would create a crisis in my sex life.
Aiya, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I hit you.
Hey, oh right, look.
I just found it, tickets for our honeymoon.
Discounted first class tickets. What do you think?
Deciding this early? What if we have trouble with the time?
Hey...
Taobao vacations. Easy to cancel. Please don't worry.
Please don't worry.
This is a guest list that I arranged.
Please look over it.
Hey,
didn't I say to not invite my dad?
Also,
why are all my ex-girlfriends on here?
Didn't you say that after breaking up
you all were still friends?
This way, there will be enough people. Just enough for two tables.
Then why are none of your ex-boyfriends on here?
Because I broke off with them completely
and clearly.
What are you mewing about? Let me have a look.
Master Miao Miao said that this stone
cannot be touched by other people.
She also said that I must carry this with me every day. It will bring me good luck.
Where is the master? Let me see.
Here, look.
Jiang Miao Miao...
This month, she reminded me to
keep one eye open and one eye closed. (Idiom: turn a blind eye)
And coincidentally, I got hit by you.
I really do have to keep one eye open and one eye closed. See?
What's wrong? Is something wrong with your eyes?
It's already been three days since we...
Mew~
Mew for me once.
I'm very busy. I'm going to leave first.
Busy, yeah right!
But when a man says he's busy,
it is time for the woman to get into action.
Come here, I'll massage you.
- Massage? - Here.
One, two, three, four, five...
What's wrong? You can't move?
I can't move.
You can't move.
My neck!
What part of your neck is uncomfortable?
Stop mewing...
Aiya!
Even if you break your neck, I will fix you!
Still sleeping~oh! Xu Fei, let big sister show you my rapid seduction!
Time to get completely in action!
You don't have a reaction and you kick me off the bed?!
Fine, Xu Fei, IT'S ON!
Sun Qing Qing gave me a Spanish perfume.
One spray and you will have all men in your grasp.
I will let you experience it tonight so you won't run away.
Stop with the "mew mew"!
Mew me tonight.
I'm going to go to the bathroom.
If you leave this bed for half a step, you're dead.
Tell me, do you have a lover outside?
- No. - No?
Actually...
Master Miao Miao told me to not have sex for 20 days.
Twenty days? How many days?
Twenty days.
There are still 17 days left. SPIDER WEBS ARE FORMING. Jiang Miao Miao, I'm going to kill your whole family.
If I didn't remember incorrectly, this magazine...
hasn't left your hands since this afternoon.
And you didn't flip the page either.
Look, it's her. This stinky woman.
- Jiang Miao Miao? - You also know her?
She's really famous.
Our company's female workers are always on her website.
And they bought quite a lot of things on her website.
Don't tell me that you believe that she
has "magical powers that stretches far and wide."
"In one second, you'll become a princess. It is 2013's most mystical divine fortune telling."
Of course I don't believe in it.
Life's pleasure comes from not knowing the future.
Exactly! For example, if someone said, "Sun Qing Qing, you're going to die the next second."
Don't jinx it!
It's just an example, okay? So in the next second, you'll "uhh"
then how will you spend your second and the second after that and after that and after that?
- Then I'll bring you to die with me. - Get out of here.
Why are you so annoyed with Jiang Miao Miao?
This woman is my curse.
When I was a freshman in college,
our school had a lot of groups, you know?
They were trying to get new members.
So I went with my friend to a very mysterious group.
Nebula Celestial Body Society?
Celestial body? What does that mean?
Universe? Sky? Sun? Milky Way?
Hey, do you think it could mean naked bodies?
A hot guy... with 8 pack abs! Haha!
Let's go and have a look.
Hey, hey! It's this way, right?
No, I just wanted to change into a bikini to match them.
Haha, okay, let's go, let's go.
What happened next was my ill-fated encounter with Jiang Miao Miao.
Get out! Not you guys, that thing.
Dodo, there are ghosts here, let's go.
Sit!
- Sit. - I'm scared.
Welcome.
Are you here to join the club?
We're just here to look around.
Are you done looking around? If you're done looking around, then let's go.
Hey, since you already came,
- then let's just read your fate. - No thanks.
- Is it for free? - We're celebrating our anniversary.
If it's free, I'll have my fate read.
Come.
Miss, is there something wrong with you? What do you want to get read?
Love.
- Your boyfriend's last name is Liang. - Wow!
It's so accurate!
I'm sorry, master. Sorry.
You guys will break up soon.
Why? Dodo, did you hear that?
Oh...I'm going to break up with my boyfriend!
- I'm getting a bad connection! - Oh, sorry.
Very soon, you'll meet a rich hottie.
You'll get married, have kids, and be a wealthy woman. Done.
Oh really?
Did you hear that? I have the life of a wealthy woman!
Hey, master, anything else?
First fill in the sign up form.
I'll sign up right now.
After all this, we have to fill in the sign up form.
She lied to you to get you to join. You're an idiot!
I think it is very accurate.
Come, let's take a look at your life.
Me? I don't need to get it read.
Aiya, come on. I already did it. It's very accurate, very accurate. Come on...
COME ON!
Love. Love.
Your boyfriend's last name is also Liang.
How coincidental.
I personally suggest that you not date.
Find a good friend to live with for your whole life.
You're destined to not get married in this life.
You will be alone till old age.
Yeah right!
You want me to say it? Give me both of your hands.
Fine.
How about I not read it?
Your boyfriends are the same person.
Qian Dodo!
What's going on?
I'm innocent.
Really...he seduced me first.
Really.
Qian Dodo, get back here! I'm not done with you!
Thank you for coming.
My God...
It sounds so melodramatic. And then what happened?
At the end, I reported her to the school, saying that she was spreading feudal superstition.
And she got expelled from school and arrested.
One. Two. One. Two. One. Two. STAND.
Turn right.
Jiang Miao Miao, a small-chested woman reported that you were spreading feudal superstitions.
Spreading feudal superstitions!
Please come with us to the police station.
Was it Qian Dodo?
Sorry, I can't reveal Miss Qian's personal information.
You pig! You just told her it was Qian Dodo!
How did you know I was born in the year of the pig (zodiac animal)?
Hey, are you guys done? This isn't feudal superstition.
This is scientific research.
Stop giving me this BS, let's go!
Hey, don't believe it?
I predict that you'll have rice thrown at your eyes.
Don't give me the BS! Get her!
Aiya, there really is rice! She's so accurate!
What are you screaming for? She's throwing it herself!
AIYA! COME WITH US!
Let go! Let go! Qian Dodo!
I curse you to never get married for life!
- Let's go! - Qian Dodo!
How come I never knew that you had such a dark and spiteful side to you?
Hey, this is righteousness.
Let me tell you, this woman isn't some good bird.
Xu Fei is definitely hiding something from me.
I think you are overthinking it.
You were worried about this Jiang Miao Miao the whole day. She can't be compared to you, okay?
I think the problem between you two is that you don't know how to keep your love.
How do I keep it?
How about I share some methods with you?
Hurry and get over here.
Sun Qing Qing, I really can't tell.
You also have this kind of method.
But let's make a promise. You must help me find this annoying woman.
No problem.
For my new life... no, for my entire life...
Jiang Miao Miao, we're coming!
It's exactly the same as ten years ago.
What are you here for?
To tell your fortune, to change your fate, to get a job promotion, to get children, to get potions, to get incantations?
The prices are all listed here.
I know what you came to ask about.
Since I'm so incredible to be able to predict the future, how could I not know what you came here for?
There is too much information I have to receive every day, so I only receive the important ones.
What I actually wanted to ask was that since you charge such high rates, are you evading your taxes?
What are you doing?
Nothing...just a little curse.
I'm not scared.
Jiang Miao Miao, do you remember who I am?
You...
Ah, no need to think about it. It's best if you don't remember.
I came to ask you something.
Do you remember this man? He came to find you.
Why did he come?
How much money?
- 2000 RMB. - 2000 RMB?
Why don't you just go steal?
What are you doing this time?
Nothing... just cursed your friendship to crumble.
Don't be scared of her. Just watch and see if she won't talk once I hit her.
2013 aikido (Japanese martial art) champion.
Thank you.
The feathers sure are nice.
Good Xiao Qing.
I'm very sorry that we don't have that much cash on us.
Well she is harsh...
Here.
It's fine if you don't want to ask anymore. Thanks for coming!
I'll ask!
While you're at it, could you also cancel that "mew mew"?
No problem. 10,000 RMB.
No need! No need to cancel it.
I already swiped it.
Then can you tell us what Xu Fei came for?
He said someone is lending him money. He's not sure if he should borrow it or not.
Borrow money? Who's he borrowing from?
He didn't tell me, but I can tell that
they have blood relations.
- Qing Qing, he won't hide from me that he got someone else pregnant, right? - No, he won't.
Jiang Miao Miao, can you be more specific?
Specifics, 10,000 RMB.
If you buy 10,000 RMB, you get 20% off.
- Did I get it? - Yeah.
But I can't calculate it.
Then why did you swipe it?
I'm not 360 search.
But I know...this money has to do with you.
Don't listen to her nonsense. Xu Fei just came to borrow money from me.
Sun Qing Qing, you really do know about him borrowing money, huh?
It has nothing to do with me. He borrowed from Lao Meng. He said there was something urgent.
Why didn't he borrow from me but from you guys?
I don't know. He asked to borrow 50,000 RMB and said that we have to keep it a secret.
Don't sell me out on this.
It's fine that he hid it from me. YOU HID IT FROM ME TOO!
Let me pick up a phone call.
Hi Lao Zhang! I'm out right now, but I'm heading back to the office now.
Isn't Lao Zhang in Hong Kong?
Qing, come, come back.
I'm not angry. What's there to get angry about?
We will definitely never break off our friendship, right?
Yeah... are you married yet, Qian Dodo?
Jiang Miao Miao, you do remember me, huh?
No matter what you want to do for your boyfriend, I suggest you not bother.
Otherwise, you'll be doomed.
Don't give me this BS!
I'll give you a free prediction of your future.
Later when you go out, you will see three couples at the same time.
Be careful of an unexpected calamity falling from the sky.
It maxed out!
Thank you for coming.
Dodo, Dodo, are you really upset?
I'm not.
I can't. If I do get upset, then Jiang Miao Miao is right.
Actually, you can't blame Xu Fei. He must have his problems.
Don't move!
Three couples at the same time.
Don't be stupid, alright?
That was clearly 6 couples. Didn't you see the 6 dogs?
Didn't she say that an unexpected calamity would fly here?
Where is it? Where is it?
Jiang Miao Miao,
this is way too evil.
The days have dragged past like a year. I endured it for twenty days. - Dodo, are you home?
Tonight, per Sun Qing Qing's suggestion, I've decided to give Xu Fei a surprise.
Dodo, where are you?
Why are you dressed like that?
Do you not like it?
It's not bad.
Are you sick? Do you fill ill anywhere?
- I have a fever. - A fever, a fever?!
you have to lie down.
Come here~
- What is this? - This is a stethoscope.
- My heart is here. - Oh right... no, it's here, it's here.
Sir, you're not well. It's like dong dong dang dong.
Let me listen. AHAHAHAHA!
It's beating quite fast. BABABABABABABAABABA.
What is this?
Ow, it hurts!
I'm sorry, how can it hurt?
It's so light. It's like a tickle.
- It doesn't hurt? - Yeah, see.
Then let me try.
Then hit me.
IT HURTS!
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - You're annoying.
Let's not play with this.
ANNOYING! Bullying me!
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - Give me your hands, rub it for me.
Rub me. Go down.
Let's go, faster.
- That's right, that's right, faster. - Going down, going down.
Let's give you something exciting. Come play with big sister!
Is this real or fake?
- It's real, follow me... - It's real?
- Cooperate, alright? - Okay, okay.
- Annoying. - Continue.
Where was I up to?
Come with big sister.
Come with big sister? Where to?
Just come along.
Let's go. LETS GO!
Oh.
It's a little tight.
Dodo, what are you doing?
It hurts. It hurts.
If it hurts, then spread your legs.
- What are you doing? - Spread them apart.
- Hurry up! HURRY UP! - IT HURTS, HURTS!
Dodo, are you okay?
Do you want to die?
Spread them apart.
Okay, spread them apart. Spread them apart.
Who is it?
How would I know?
Dodo! Do you have friends that are coming also?
Your mom...who is it disturbing the mood?
I want a new life!
- Whoa! This is problematic! - What are you doing?
- Where's the sick person? - Where's the sick person?
- There is no sick person. - Since you're dressed like that, you must be trying to snatch our patient. Attack!
I'll attack too.
AHHH!
Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry!
- Where is the patient? - Where is the patient?
- There is no patient. - Your clothes are pretty. Where did you buy it?
- Are you talking about me? - No, I'm talking about her.
You guys really have problems...
Hey your hat is pretty too, where did you buy it?
- Are you talking about me? - I'm talking about her.
Very exciting, very exciting, very exciting...
- Where exactly is the patient? - Where is the patient?
What are you doing? What are you doing? And you stupid fatty. Someone is dying over there.
- We came to the wrong place. - We really did.
If you really want to act, you should just play the role of a prostitute.
Act as a prostitute.
Xu Fei! Xu Fei! I thought of a good idea!
I never thought that the fat lady's suggestion would be so exciting.
Jiang Miao Miao, you can't win me.
Tonight, I'm going to let myself go.
- Miss... - I'm not a miss.
Aren't you a miss?
How much money?
How much money do you have?
I have nothing but money.
HEY!
- What are you doing? - Give us your ID and come with us to the police station.
Wife, there is another person inside.
Hurry and go!
What are you doing?
Engaging in prostitution?
Nothing... nothing. See? Nothing.
Hey!
Don't be upset, alright?
It's my bad, okay? I made you stay with me all night at the police station.
How could you think of something as stupid as that?
Hey! But...when I thought of the idea, you agreed.
What do you want? I already apologized.
Hey!
Then tell me, what do I have to do for you to not be angry?
Very easy.
Just dance in public wearing pajamas...then I'll forgive you.
Ah Xu Fei, let me tell you! Don't go overboard!
I didn't even ask you, secretly borrowing money behind my back...what's going on?
How did you find out?
Nothing, if you need money, you can't tell me?
Why bother finding some mystical lady?
Am I your fiancée or is she your fiancée?
And you say things like how you'll never lie to me.
Okay then...you really want to know?
I borrowed money because something happened at my dad's company.
He needs money.
I may not have a good relationship with my father...but I'm still his son.
We're still family.
But, I will also be a part of your family.
Because I didn't want you to worry, I didn't tell you.
Master Miao Miao was correct.
She told me to be good and not have sex; then nothing would happen.
Master Miao Miao?
Not have sex? Jiang Miao Miao, I didn't even get you for this.
Hello Qing Qing?
Come out.
Hey, what are you up to?
Not telling you.
♫ You want to follow your principles,
♫ but you aren't willing to listen to us.
♫ Fa Hai, you don't understand love.(Fa Hai is the evil monk in the Legend of the White Snake)
♫ Leifeng Pagoda will fall down.
So not classy.
♫ Fa Hai, you really don't understand love.
You're here again. What is it this time?
Jiang Miao Miao, let me ask you...did you tell Xu Fei to not have sex for 20 days?
Yeah. If a man can't even control his lust,
how will he be able to control his life and pay back 50,000 RMB?
Is it directed towards me?
Ah yes, I did cause you to get arrested.
But sister, please, that was ten years ago.
Can you stop being so stingy?
Grow up, alright?
I'm getting married now.
I'm begging you, stop meddling in between, alright?
I wasn't directing towards you.
I just said what I saw... that's all.
This is the fate that the heavens decided.
Since the heavens decide on our fate, you're always predicting it. Are you not scared of getting punished?
I'm speaking the truth, why would I be scared of getting punished?
Why do people get their fates read?
Isn't it because they don't feel safe, Qian Dodo?
What do we have to do to find a sense of security?
Dance.
- Dance? - Come, Dodo.
It's fine, come.
It's fine.
It is 2000 RMB.
ONE. TWO. ONE. TWO. ONE. TWO. STAND.
TURN LEFT.
Hey...isn't this the person...who was walking the dog?
It is me. I'm Wendy!
Hello Miss Jiang, we are Interpol FBI.
You have the right to keep silent but every word you say can be used against you.
Miss Jiang, someone accused you of selling fake water, fake crystals, fake stones, fake cats, fake dogs, and fake eagles!
And you are suspected to have thrown items from a high altitude to injure a fat woman named Wendy.
- Who's a fat woman? - Wendy!
Miss Jiang, please come with us.
I predict that you will get rice thrown at your eyes.
- We're not scared. - We're wearing sunglasses this time.
That's right.
- Oh, you grew up, huh? - Stop.
I also grew up.
Let's go.
Miss Jiang, please put down the eagle.
Stingy...
Let's go.
2,000 RMB.
Do you have a credit card reader?
Let's go! One. Two. One. Two. One. Two.
So did she throw that flower pot last time?
Hi.
What are you doing here?
Why are you not sincere?
Sincere?
There are three little bears living together.
Daddy bear, Mommy bear, Baby bear.
Daddy bear is very strong.
Mommy bear is very slim.
Baby bear is very cute.
One day, one day, he grew up.
Didn't you say that you would forgive me if I danced on the streets?
Not yet.
DADDY BEAR IS VERY STRONG.
MOMMY BEAR IS VERY SLIM.
I am really in the wrong this time.
Please, please, please, forgive me.
Okay, okay, I forgive you.
Qing Qing already told me everything.
I understand that you really worry about our relationship, but please trust me.
No matter what I do, I'm not doing it to hurt you.
I already decided to marry you.
I won't change my decision because of the little things that other people say.
The reason you didn't get married before is that the person who proposed wasn't me.
Hey!
Are you crazy? That was 6000 RMB!
That's not worth much. As long as you are happy.
Do you know... what would make me happier?
What?
Dance with me.
Dance?
- That's not such a good idea. - Why?
There are actually a lot of people watching.
Dance!
DANCE!
Dance!
Dance, hurry!
Follow my beat.
There are three little bears living together.
Daddy bear, Mommy bear, Baby bear.
Daddy Bear is very strong.
It doesn't matter if fate decides on love, or love decides fate.
I just know that my decision is you.
Subtitles brought to you by The Dodo Team @ Viki